A Morning With Folgers
It’s noon and my coffee is brewing. Like first pot of the day brewing.
We need a new coffee pot. I always make 5 cups even though we are 2 girls (I don’t know what Josh drinks— Flowberry Fizz or some shit), mostly because an entire cup spills out into the sink when you pour it. While I’m waiting for my coffee, I play the New York Times games. There’s a new one called Strands, which is essentially just a word search. My mom always told me I was really good at practical life in preschool. Practical Life was a class we had where we just poured liquids from one receptacle into another. And you could say I am good at that, as that is actually how I make a living, or you could look at the coffee in the sink and say otherwise. But what she doesn’t know, is that I am also good at word searches.
God, this coffee takes long to brew. I shouldn’t be having a caffeine headache at noon. I’m sure Eli Rallo has already done a fitness class, cleaned her kitchen, journaled, made toast, and had a Poppi. Or she just made it look like she did and she actually has a caffeine headache. Fucking fuck, my head hurts, and it’s so gray in here. It’s going to rain Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, which is three whole days last time I checked, and I think eventually I’m going to have to leave the building during one of them. The light switch in my bedroom has been broken, and neither of the two fix-it men in my life (they know who they are) can fix it, so I’m perpetually at the mercy of the clouds.
Is this all I have to write about? Laundry, service jobs, coffee? My boyfriend calls it slices of life, but my slices should have pepperoni or some shit on it. I’m more interesting than this. I had the opportunity to write about traveling around the literal country, but that came and went with no product, and somehow it’s easier to write about the kitchen sink. Alex, working towards his degree, is envious that our lives are a permanent vacation, but I’m either in bed or walking places. Those are the only two options. And during those options, I’m either consuming media or making things temporarily better for my own house or patrons of a restaurant. Or listening to Josh play the drums on his bowl of oatmeal. That was kind of fun just now. But what is this vacation? Oatmeal? (The best part of this is that sometimes my writing seems to stretch the truth, but right now I do get to truthfully share that in this minute that I am typing, Josh just asked our friends on the phone while playing Fortnite, “do you guys like oatmeal?”) So what are we all working towards? A promotion? At my service job? I kind of boxed myself in in terms of experience, but I’m planets away from being on Broadway, and I don’t have the means to work towards that. Give me a degree. Make it math, or computer science, or advanced enviro-green marketing appliances, I don’t care. Give me something to work towards. I’ll do homework and drink coffee and, oh shit it’s probably ready.
—
I’m back. I’m thinking about how annoying this all is. You’re telling me I can’t do ANYTHING until I have a cup of hot water spiked with beans? That I have to wake up every day and brew hot water with beans dripping into it and waste an hour until I’m ready to function? That my stomach and my brain simultaneously can’t wake up and I can’t eat anything until I’ve ingested my daily drugs. That’s ridiculous. And enough with these girls on Tik Tok saying “I made coffee for myself two days in a row for free, so I can get Starbucks today.” First of all, read the news. Second of all, are you growing the beans your damn self? How is that free? We have to buy coffee grounds every three days in this house. We drink it so much, and it honestly smells great. We do have such a cute little coffee house. My roommate and I agree that when we wake up to the other one already brewing the pot, it feels like the day after Christmas. We are so cute. And our living room looks so cute right now.
I’m kind of excited that it’s raining because it means less people will be out, and the people that ARE out are the real ones. They aren’t letting the rain stop them. I’m going to go on a rain walk today. And maybe I’ll do laundry and replenish our cleaning supplies. That’s so exciting!
There’s so many hours in this day left. I think maybe I’ll become famous today. Guys, this blog is good! And I recently learned that there are agents that specialize in blogging and digital media. I do that sometimes! I’m going to rebrand. I’m so excited!!
And when I’m famous, everyone will care about all the cute things I do during my day, like drinking water, and my silk pillowcases, and the new playlist I made for spring. Everyone’s going to care! Yay!!!
I should make plans today. I love that I don’t have to text my friends with updates about my life, because odds are I’ll see them at some point during the day and I can share with them then! We should all go on a rain walk. Or I can just hang out with my roommates. How lucky am I that I get built-in social time every single day just by waking up?!
And honestly, if it took me four years in college to really ground myself in my academic career, maybe in four years, I’ll finally ground myself in my professional career. So in four years, I’ll be on Broadway. I honestly think that’s how it works, and I’m really good at being optimistic. I always have been. This is like, wow, so exciting!!!!
You know what sounds really good right now? OATMEAL. I’m starving!!!!!